After a workshop I ran last week, where almost everyone brought up stress or anxiety, I realised just how many people struggle to differentiate what’s truly worth stressing about… and how to let the rest go. That inspired me to write this post.
Stress has become so common that it often feels like the background noise of life. We worry about things that haven’t happened yet. We lose sleep over comments we replay in our heads. We get worked up about delays, to-do lists, unanswered texts, or how we looked in that meeting. In this sea of constant anxiety, the real question is:
What is actually worth stressing about? And when did we learn to stress about so many things that aren’t real threats at all?
Somewhere along the line, we adopted the belief that being constantly “on edge” is normal, even admirable. We wear stress like a badge of honour, believing that if we’re not constantly worried, we’re not working hard enough.
But this constant over-activation of the nervous system is not only unsustainable; it’s unhealthy.
We’ve become so used to the adrenaline rush of micro-stresses that our brains now react to a late email the same way they’d react to an actual threat. We’ve trained our bodies to exist in a state of hyper vigilance, and it’s exhausting.
According to Dr. Kaushik Ram, neuroscientist and author of “Hidden World: The Inside Story of the Soul,” much of our stress is caused by disconnection between the brain and the body.
He explains that in many people, the autonomic nervous system is stuck in overdrive. That means your body is constantly running a fight-or-flight program, even when you’re not in danger.
When this happens, your nervous system can’t tell the difference between a project deadline, a real emergency or a thought about something that might go wrong in the future.
The result? You feel anxious. You overthink. You react instead of respond.
But the good news is: your body already knows how to return to calm, you just have to let it.
Working with Dr. Ram for several years has helped me embraced the idea that my body is not just a passenger in my life, but a source of deep wisdom and regulation. True resilience comes not from more thinking, but from reconnecting with the body.
This is what it means:
- Our breath can calm our nervous system in seconds.
- Our posture can signal to our brain whether we are safe or under threat
- The awareness of our bodily sensations (heartbeat, tension, warmth, tingling) can anchor us to the present moment
This is why overthinking doesn’t solve stress, but dropping into the body often does.
What’s Actually Worth Stressing About?
Let’s pause and reflect.
What really deserves your energy, your peace, your nervous system?
Ask yourself:
- Is this a real, present danger, or just a projection?
- Can I do something about this right now?
- Is this aligned with what truly matters to me?
If not, maybe it doesn’t deserve your stress.
Four Practices To Begin Breaking The Habit Of Overreacting
- Come Out of the Head and Into the Body: Notice your breath. Your shoulders. Your heartbeat. Just feeling your body is enough to start the process of calming down.
- Practice “Functional Breathing”: Try this: Inhale slowly through the nose for 4 seconds, exhale for 6. Repeat for 1 minute. This activates your parasympathetic nervous system (rest & digest).
- Reclaim Your Posture: Standing tall and open changes how your brain and body communicate. Slumping tells your nervous system you’re under threat. Reclaiming your posture tells it: I’m safe. I’ve got this.
- Take Interoceptive Pauses: Throughout your day, pause for 30 seconds. Notice your internal state without trying to fix it. These “check-ins” are a powerful way to stay regulated.
Most of the stress we carry is not about life-and-death situations.
It’s about trying to control the uncontrollable, worrying about what others think or projecting fears into the future.
The truth is that our brain and body already know how to find calm. So next time you feel yourself spiralling, pause and ask:
Is this worth my peace?
Because in the end, peace doesn’t come from perfect circumstances. It comes from choosing what to give your energy to, and letting the rest go.
Stress isn’t just in your mind; it’s in your body. And your body knows how to return to calm.
Inspired by Dr. Kaushik Ram
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